Thoughts in time and out of season,
The Hitchhiker
stood by the side of the road,
and leveled his thumb,
in the calm calculus of reason.
That lyric is from a Doors song, well sort of, it was recorded as spoken word while Jim Morrison was still alive, mixed into another song, Riders On The Storm, and released posthumously. (that means taking a dirt nap) Its about a guy who gets picked up, makes some small talk, and then he murders some one. There's a killer on the road...
One could only wish our voice could be recorded, saved forever, mixed by whomever wants to, and resubmitted for the masses. wait, hold on a sec.... i just checked the interwebs, its been done, they call it itunes. there goes another million dollar idea ruined by the internet. thanks alot internet, learn how to keep a secret, will ya? you're a jerk.
I haven't written in a while because my life at work has been a one man shitshow tennis match against myself. I don't think that's an expression, but is fun to say. try it. I knew you would. use it, go ahead you will get the same dumb looks I get. Its like a club, we can all be members of the Dumb Look Club.
But, on the bright side, my life is getting better, slowly, but surely.
The rest of this post is going to be some random thoughts, notes that I have taken over the last 4 months or so, ideas that I thought could stand on their own, perhaps some day they will grow up, and be full grown posts , but for right now, Ill just spew some thoughts out, okay? okay.
As I am writing this, there is a total lunar eclipse occurring. pretty freaking awesome. The moon is a sliver of its former self, as of an hour ago, and is beginning to turn red. It is commonly called a Blood Moon. Again, pretty freaking awesome.
That goes along with my first one:
The Inner Eye- we all have things we see, how we interpret them is another story. some may see the glass half empty, I choose to see that I am half as thirsty as I was two seconds ago. While some may see a rainy day, I choose to see a good opportunity for a nap.(not a dirt one, by the way)
Four out of five Dennis's recommend it- I dont know who these five guys named Dennis are, but what do they care if I chew gum or not?
Jorneyman, Apprentice, Beggarman, Thief- my friend's kids go to a private school, not some high falutin' secluded monastery in the mountains, just not a public school. Thing is, they don't give letter grades for the students, the give titles. Things like Journeyman, Apprentice, Learner, etc. I wonder if, upon graduation, they give them a title summing up their future prospects? Things like douchebag, high roller, or narcissist? that would take a lot of guesswork out of the interviewer when they are applying for jobs. "well, I see here you got a rating of Ass Pirate upon graduation, tell me more"
why is there no air in space? what about the air in space museum, Its a real place, I saw it on the television once.
Diorama or Diarrhea- one is a miniture display of something inside of something, the other isnt. Or maybe it kinda is.
Interpersonal Schema Cycle- its when someone does or says the same thing to many different people and gets the same result. Like a catchphrase or a battle cry, Even "GERONIMO!" doesnt mean shit if your not jumping out of a plane. I had a friend who used to say "it is what it is" about a hundred times a day, very annoying, since he really didn't know what "is" is, or was, After a while when he said it I began to erase in my mind everything else he said before and after that, seriously, I cant think of one thing he said other than that. If I ever find myself riding an Interpersonal Schema Cycle, I'm gonna trade it in for a Vespa. Then it will be an Interpersonal Schema Scooter. sounds a lot more fun. and awkward, especially at the local biker bar.
A Majordomo is some one who takes care of every detail of a kings or other person of importance's house. kind of like Geoffrey on the fresh prince, or Benson from soap(remember that show?) I think I have just found a new life goal, But I want to do it part time, and have an assistant, and in the Caribbean, and for a considerable amount of money. Not too much to ask right?
I think people who have piercings are okay, but I find it enjoyable to think up quotes of things they may or may not say. One small stud in your nose says "I'm a mother of two, but I want everyone to think I lead a double life, which of course I don't because I'm a mother of two" a large rod in your nose says" I dont like to blow my nose, so dont ask me for a tissue" any skin piercing across a flat space like neckback or side boob " I got a cut there, and duct tape wasn't holding"
I Thank God and Baby Jesus every day since the Zombie Apocalypse is over. I was getting sick of walking around moaning, with my arms straight out, in ripped and dirty clothes from the seventies, in an effort to fool the real zombies into thinking I was one of them. I think they knew though, but they just were trying to use me to get some brains. Fortunately for me, I don't have enough for them to bother with. It is over? Right?
Hitchikers are random, they turn up here and there, either on the actual side of the road, or on the metaphoric road of life. They need something, you provide it, like a ride or a nice conversation. some times they are not able to do it themselves, and we feel morally obligated to help. To try to get them to their destination. And they almost always kill you.
Pistolgrip Out.
